


The Setting Sun Reveals Insanity

by Misos



Category: Vocaloid
Genre: Based on a Dream, Christmas, Comedy, M/M, Meta, clips of the actual Vocaloids reading their dialogue (badly), lots of semi-obscure Vocaloid references, subtle Danganronpa reference
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-13
Updated: 2014-12-13
Packaged: 2018-02-28 05:43:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2720909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Misos/pseuds/Misos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Miku strongly regrets going to Gackpo's Christmas party, Kiyoteru loses his glasses and his mind, and Davros has no idea what he's doing in a car with three Japanese voice synthesizers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Setting Sun Reveals Insanity

**Author's Note:**

> So, I had a peculiar dream about six months ago. Since I still find it so amusing, and it is a Christmas-themed dream after all, I decided to adapt it into a fanfiction. I apologize if it makes no sense. I tried to construct something of a rational plot, but there's only so much that can be done with such a surreal concept. And yes, I do spell it "Gackpo Camui". I'm aware that I am very much in the minority about that. There's a sudden Doctor Who crossover near the end, but since this is 99% Vocaloid, I didn't tag it.  
> Also, I had Kiyoteru say some of his lines here, to take advantage of the fact that this is a Vocaloid fanfiction. Sorry if he sounds ridiculous. If I ever acquire Gackpo or Miku, I'll add some of their lines, too.  
>  **UPDATE: ******In a hilariously apropos coincidence, I received Gackpo for Christmas. So, now he's talking too. (I used V3 Native, if anyone cares.) I think he ended up sounding marginally better than Kiyoteru, but I'd still hardly call him intelligible. He also sounds incredibly bored, probably as a result of my using him at the lower end of his range in an attempt to make him sound like he does in Drown and Lost.  
>  **UPDATE 2:** And here's Miku English.

It was 10 PM, and Miku Hatsune was just about ready to rip her headphones off and smash them into thrity-nine pieces. It wasn’t that she hated Christmas carols, it was just that she hated _human_ Christmas carols, and those were, unfortunately, the only kind available. Listening to organics singing was pretty much sacrilege around there, but how else was she supposed to get into the Christmas spirit? Of course, she wasn’t really one for Christmas anyway, but Big Al had threatened to damn everyone’s souls if they didn’t celebrate the holiday joyously enough. He had been saying sinister things like that ever since his mysterious trip to Taiwan. Miku dearly hoped it was just a phase.

Someone knocked at the door. Fearing it might be Big Al, Miku made sure she was wearing a wreath of holly before answering it.

[“Er, hi,”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/skdrg0cw5rb7b66/Er,_hi.mp3) said Kiyoteru Hiyama, looking distinctly awkward. But then, he usually did.

[“Oh, right,” said Miku in relief. “The party. Is Luka with you?”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/ef0jbl55pfx04nb/Oh,_right,_the_party;_is_Luka_with_you.mp3)

[“No,” Kiyoteru confessed. “She cancelled.”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/e8cu43daxc33vmj/No;_she_cancelled.mp3)

“Oh.” Miku let a note of disappointment creep into her voice. “How about Gumi?”

[“No,” Kiyoteru confessed. “She cancelled.”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/e8cu43daxc33vmj/No;_she_cancelled.mp3)

“Rin?”

[“No,” Kiyoteru confessed. “She cancelled.”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/e8cu43daxc33vmj/No;_she_cancelled.mp3)

“Did anyone _not_ cancel?” Miku demanded in exasperation.

“Yes.” Kiyoteru averted his gaze to stare at the side of Miku’s house.

“Who?” Miku was starting to get the distinct feeling that something was up.

[“Ah… Er…” Kiyoteru fidgeted a bit before answering. “C-Camui-kun.”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/r5id4hp841p72fq/Ah...er...C-Camui-kun.mp3) He blushed a bright scarlet.

[“Okay…” Miku stared, trying to get a handle on what this all meant. “What’s with the surname?”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/bwsx4s2sjdkv7tc/Okay;_what's_with_the_surname.mp3)

“Because… Because his given name has two adjacent hard consonants, and I’m Japanese!” Kiyoteru replied quickly.

[“So am I,” Miku pointed out. “Yet I can say it. ‘Gackpo’. See?”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/63y41f60jr0o0q7/So_am_I,_yet_I_can_say_it;_Gackpo;_see.mp3)

“Yes, well, we don’t all have English voicebanks, now, do we?” Kiyoteru still refused to meet her eyes. “Are you going to get in the car, or not?”

“Is there some _reason_ everyone but me, you, and Gackpo cancelled?” Miku queried as they walked down the sidewalk.

Kiyoteru coughed loudly. “Not as far as I know,” he muttered.

Filled with misgivings, Miku opened the passenger-side door of Kiyoteru’s car. At least, she thought it was Kiyoteru’s car, but on second thought, it was awfully purple… This all looked like quite the conspiracy.

– – –

“Okay, seriously, what’s going on?” asked Miku, when the awkward silence became too much to bear.

Kiyoteru twitched. [“Nothing,” he said quickly.](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/fqr3v99y44q9r28/Nothing.mp3)

“Nothing,” Miku echoed flatly.

Kiyoteru nodded, silent.

“Look, there’s obviously _something_!” Miku burst out. “Why are you so nervous?!”

“It’s just – the party – and I – Camui-kun – he – er –“ Kiyoteru spluttered.

“Never mind,” Miku groaned, leaning her head against the window. She was afraid that if she pushed further, Kiyoteru might crash the car.

It was a good thing she didn’t, for by the time he had pulled into Gackpo’s driveway, Kiyoteru had nearly hit five trees, narrowly avoided running into a fence, and almost ran down three passing dogs, and all while going about ten miles per hour. He honestly deserved some kind of award, thought Miku, as she stepped shakily out of the car.

Kiyoteru was standing frozen in front of the house.

“Why don’t you knock?” asked Miku, shutting the car door behind her.

“Oh, I’m sorry!” Kiyoteru coughed loudly and adjusted his tie before rapping daintily on the door.

[“Hi!” The door immediately swung open, and Gackpo poked his head out. “Teru! Man, it’s great to – Wait.” He caught sight of Miku. “She didn’t cancel?”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/vex4tjqq419y2jg/Hi!_Teru!_Man,_it's_great_to_%E2%80%93_Wait;_she_didn't_cancel.mp3)

[“No,” Kiyoteru affirmed. “She didn’t cancel.”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/u1dlka0kajp801l/No,_she_didn't_cancel.mp3)

[“ _Well_ ,” said Gackpo. He shrugged. “Too bad!”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/np6wc2hjv9io1fv/Well%3B+too+bad.mp3)

[“Excuse me?” Miku asked sharply.](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/uv8arnjwixfpm2v/Excuse_me.mp3)

“Come on.” Gackpo ignored Miku’s remark entirely and stood back, gesturing into his house as if he was a butler and Miku was a village girl about to get stuck in some deranged time loop or something.

– – –

As it turned out, nobody got stuck in a time loop, although Miku would have infinitely preferred that to what _did_ happen. It started when Gackpo went into the kitchen to, ostensibly, retrieve some more plates of food. He had called for Kiyoteru’s help in carrying things, and everything had been just dandy until Miku happened to notice that they’d been in there about fifteen minutes too long.

It was a surprise to no one, save for all three of the characters involved, when she opened the kitchen door to find Kiyoteru’s fingers running through Gackpo’s long purple hair and Gackpo’s pinky finger stroking the nape of Kiyoteru’s neck, a strange pose which clearly held some deeper meaning. They were also, quite incidentally, kissing.

[“What are you _doing_?!”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/uebv1segruu19hr/What_are_you_doing!.mp3)

Kiyoteru jumped and hastily disentangled himself from Gackpo, his face red. [“Rehearsing!” he squawked.](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/qae90aapa6lxlr6/Rehearsing!.mp3)

“Rehearsing for _what_?” Miku demanded in disbelief.

“For – For Drown and Lost!” Kiyoteru clarified.

“It’s a great song!” Gackpo put in.

“Then why weren’t you _singing_?” asked Miku.

“We were getting in the right mindset!” replied Kiyoteru.

“Give it up, Teru,” Gackpo advised. “She’s not falling for it.”

“But –“ Kiyoteru said in a panic. “Camui-kun –!”

“Why do you keep _calling_ him that?” Miku interrupted in exasperation. “What’s wrong with just ‘Gackpo’?!”

“Ah… It’s just…” Kiyoteru adjusted his glasses, staring fixedly at the floor. “H-His given name…? It just seems so…” He blushed for the fiftieth time that day. “…So _intimate_.”

Miku narrowed her eyes. “He was just covering your words of hesitation in making a contract with his gluttonous tongue, like, five seconds ago, and _you_ think calling him by his _name_ is ‘too intimate’?”

“Er… yes?” Kiyoteru affirmed weakly.

Miku stared in utter incredulity, or rather, what she had _thought_ was utter incredulity before Gackpo spoke up again and she subsequently realized that incredulity could always deepen.

[“C’mon, babe.” Gackpo grabbed Kiyoteru’s hand. Two incredulity points. “Let’s go stab the excess desire to each other, or, uh, something.”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/uu3b89rre66xbar/C%27mon%2C+babe%3B+let%27s+go+stab+the+excess+desire+to+each+other+or%2C+uh%2C+something.mp3)

It was at this point that Miku got a headache.

“Absolutely not!” Kiyoteru snapped, twitching his hand weakly without withdrawing it. “You have a guest!”

“She could’ve cancelled if she minded so much! That’s what everyone _else_ did!”

[“How was _I_ supposed to know that this was going to be Château PDA?!” Miku cut in.](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/378c59dq63b6aio/How_was_I_supposed_to_know_that_this_was_going_to_be_Chateau_PDA.mp3)

“Well, I mean, Teru told you that we were a thing now, and –“

“He told me nothing of the sort!”

“What?” Gackpo looked at Kiyoteru, confused. “Why not? I told everyone else.”

“I…didn’t see a good place to bring it up!” Kiyoteru stammered. “I mean – What exactly was I supposed to say?”

“Well, _I_ said ‘Hi, guys! I’ve decided to theme this year’s party after Drown and Lost, unless Teru drops dead in the meantime, in which case I’m theming it after Prince of Necrophilia instead! Who’s coming?' and they all cancelled,” said Gackpo matter-of-factly.

[“You said _that_?” Kiyoteru choked.](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/26rdb9et58dzt5c/You_said_THAT!.mp3) He buried his face in his hands. “How do you ever expect me to look any of them in the eye again?!”

Gackpo clapped him on the back. “It’s no big deal! I mean, so maybe Kaito won’t speak to me now, and Zunko fainted. And Gumi threw her headphones at me. But they’ll get over it! Just give it a few years, and everyone will forget this ever happened!”

“I’m surprised Mayu didn’t come anyway,” Miku commented.

“Oh, she had already cancelled before I even said that,” said Gackpo. “Apparently she was busy tonight.”

“I’m sure,” said Miku. “Busy planning to murder Kiyoteru so that you’d go for the Prince of Necrophilia option, I bet.”

[“What?!”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/6ydjryn4tku88po/WHAT!.mp3) Kiyoteru looked distinctly unnerved.

“Hey, you’re safe in here.” Gackpo squeezed his shoulder in a comforting manner. “Besides, you’d make a gorgeous corpse! I’d hotly run my tongue over _your_ frozen eyes, let me tell you!” He led Kiyoteru, who did not look quite comforted, out of the room.

– – –

Miku thought that was the end of it. That is, until they tried to decorate the Christmas tree, and Miku ended up doing all the work because the other two were too busy kissing. She thought _that_ was the end of it, until she was the only one who ate anything at dinner, because the other two were too busy kissing. And _still_ , she thought that was the end of it, until she turned a corner in the hall only to run right into Kiyoteru and Gackpo, who, if their guilty expressions were any indication, had probably been kissing.

At this point, Miku decided to retreat to the library. She settled herself in a chair, and picked up a book. It was the novelization of The Madness of Duke Venomania. She put that one down, and picked up _Waltz of Evil: The Deadly Sins of Evil Guidebook_. She put that one down, too, once she realized that every mention of Seth Twiright was circled in purple pen with rings of hearts. She had just begun to read _Star Girl and the Illusion Paradise_ , which seemed to be safe, when a sharp cracking sound served as the only warning for the abrupt collapse of the roof, accompanied by a thud and a piercing scream.

When the dust cleared, the first thing Miku noticed was the gaping hole in the ceiling.

[“So much for the attic,” came Gackpo’s voice from the floor. ](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/37l0e6qsneevneq/So+much+for+the+attic.mp3)He rolled off of Kiyoteru, who had been trapped uncomfortably beneath him. Gackpo stood up and dusted himself off before extending a hand to pull Kiyoteru to his feet as well.

Kiyoteru redid the top buttons of his shirt and pulled his tie back into place. His glasses had, miraculously, survived the fall. “I told you that was a bad idea!”

“Bad idea?” Gackpo echoed, affronted. “It was a great idea! Attics are full of warmth to scramble for!”

[“ALL RIGHT!” Miku yelled. “THAT DOES IT! No more kissing! No more bantering! No more quoting Drown and Lost! You two, get in the car!”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/wtv6k5itb7zaa6k/All_right!_That_does_it!_No_more_kissing!_No_more_bantering!_No_more_quoting_Drown_and_Lost!_You_two,_get_in_the_car!.mp3)

There was a bit of confused protesting, but get in the car they did. Kiyoteru tried to get in the back seat with Gackpo, but Miku saw that one coming a mile away, and insisted that he sit in the front. Finally, Miku herself took the driver’s seat, and started the ignition.

– – –

After enduring about fifteen minutes of banter and quoting Drown and Lost, which she had really meant to put a stop to, after all, Miku thought it couldn’t get any worse. She was wrong. As she took a sharp left turn, she heard it:

“Camui-kun! Quick! Where did my glasses go?”

“Uh, wait, you dropped them?”

“They fell off! Hurry!”

“Hang on. I think I see them under your seat. What’s the big rush, anywa–“

Kiyoteru cut him off with a piercing scream. Then he fell silent.

Miku was afraid to look. Soon, however, she didn’t need to.

[“ _Finally_.” Kiyoteru’s voice sounded as if it had been set to + 20 Gender Factor, – 30 Brightness, – 25 Clearness, + 50 Breathiness. “I was getting _really_ hot in this suit.”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/9e55g9zgm8u0qca/FINALLY._I_was_getting_really_hot_in_this_suit.mp3)

Miku heard a rustling of clothing. [“Kiyoteru Hiyama!” she yelled, not taking her eyes off the road. “If you take off so much as your left shoe, I am going to throttle you!”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/dnd1kiravna6r7w/Kiyoteru_Hiyama!_If_you_take_off_so_much_as_your_left_shoe,_I_am_going_to_throttle_you!.mp3)

“What if I just took off my jacket?” he pleaded. “I’m really hot, I swear!”

“Stop sniggering, Gackpo,” Miku ordered before sighing, “Fine. Take off your jacket and shut up.”

“I don’t _want_ to shut up! I’ve been cooped up in Mr. Restraint here for _ages_!”

“Okay, seriously,” said Gackpo, “what’s going on?”

“I removed my morals with pleasure,” Kiyoteru explained.

“Oh,” said Gackpo. “So Jewelfish is going on, then. Good. I always thought that was a great song.”

“You said the same thing about Drown and Lost!” Miku pointed out.

“Yeah, and?” Gackpo replied. “So I can appreciate a bit of binding and desecrating! Is that so wrong?!”

“Nah,” said Kiyoteru, at precisely the same time that Miku firmly opined, “Yes.”

[“Don’t listen to her,” Kiyoteru said dismissively. “You can desecrate me any time, Gackie darling.”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/b8bbi6guec14dnp/Don't_listen_to_her._You_can_desecrate_me_any_time,_Gackie_darling.mp3)

Narrowly missing running into a tree, Miku suddenly found herself wishing that Kiyoteru would call Gackpo by his surname, after all. He had been quite correct: “Camui-kun” was indeed intimate enough.

“And I thought you were weird for never taking your glasses off,” Gackpo was muttering in awe.

“Oh, right. Those things. I think I’ll smash them. Hold on.”

Miku risked a glance to her left to see Kiyoteru attempting to scramble over the back of his seat. She reached out a hand and yanked him back down by his tie.

[“ _Ouch_ , lady!” he choked, rubbing his neck. “That _hurt_!”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/padc7rnzdksae4b/Ouch,_Lady!_That_hurt!.mp3)

“Then sit still, you lunatic!” Miku hissed.

“But Gackie’s in the back seat, and so are my glasses, and I wanna destroy one and kiss the other!”

“Stop _calling_ him that!” snapped Miku.

“What?” Kiyoteru looked affronted. “Why?”

[“Because – Because –“ Miku paused. “Because if Gackt was here, we wouldn’t know who you were talking about!”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/u3ch6rr2x87332c/Because-_Because-_Because_if_Gackt_was_here,_we_wouldn't_know_who_you_were_talking_about!.mp3)

“Oh, _thanks_!” Gackpo yelled from the back seat. “Just trigger my inferiority complex, why don’t you?!”

“Don’t say that!” Kiyoteru exclaimed. “You’re much better than Gackt! I mean, your hair is purple!”

[“I dye it,” Gackpo said glumly. “It’s actually black.”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/ft2vcdwlnedcken/I_dye_it;_it's_actually_black.mp3)

Kiyoteru looked liked a three-year-old who had just been told there was no such person as Santa Claus. [“No!” he whispered in horror. “ _It can’t be!_ ”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/kg7pvrcszl7nszf/No!_It_can't_be!.mp3)

“Sorry I never told you.” Gackpo’s voice was rife with angst. “I was always so afraid you would leave me when you found out the truth, and I just couldn’t take that!”

“Oh, Gackie!” Tears sprang to Kiyoteru’s eyes. “I would never! We can get past this somehow! No matter what color your hair is, I still love you, and –“

[“Okay, that’s it!” Miku yelled, slamming the brakes. “We’re picking up this…guy! Maybe _he’ll_ shut you two up!”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/1fwa43k84zii403/Okay!_That's_it!_We're_picking_up_this-guy!_Maybe_he'll_shut_you_two_up!.mp3)

“Guy?” asked Gackpo, choking back a sob. “What guy? Who are you –“ [He gasped sharply as the car door slid open. “ _Wow_ , you’re ugly!”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/lr83f3v6kmzdqoo/Wow,_you're_ugly!.mp3)

“Excuse me?” hissed a new voice from the back seat. It sounded far more electronic that any Vocaloid.

[“Uh, I mean… Nice outfit!” Gackpo said hastily. “I’m really digging the whole ‘Nazi’ look!](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/bh5zx8h39poplz2/Uh,_I_mean%E2%80%A6_Nice_outfit!_I'm_really_digging_the_whole_'Nazi'_look!.mp3) Um, I’m Gackpo Camui. That’s Kiyoteru Hiyama, and –”

“Not!” Kiyoteru shouted. “The name’s Kiyackpo Hiyamui!”

“Um,” said Gackpo.

“…I see,” said the voice. “I…am Davros.”

“So, you’re British or something?” asked Gackpo.

“No,” snapped Davros. “Skarosian.”

“Where are you headed?” asked Miku, as Gackpo and Kiyoteru had finally, and thankfully, gone silent.

Davros rattled off a string of coordinates, which Miku only got half of.

“That’s on the other side of the world,” said Kiyoteru, saving Miku from having to decipher them.

“What?” said Davros irritably. “Then where is this?”

“Japan,” said Miku.

“I have never heard of that location.”

For the twelfth time that day, Miku was overcome with incredulity. “Are you serious?”

Davros let out a long, synthesized sigh. “This endeavor is fruitless.”

Kiyoteru giggled, much to Miku’s trepidation. “ _Mukidashi no mama_ –“ he began to warble before Miku elbowed him sharply. “Ow! What was that for?!”

Miku just glared at the road ahead of her.

“I shall exit this vehicle at the next stop,” Davros said decisively. Miku didn’t blame him. “I can call my ship from there. We obviously have miscalculated our destination.”

[“Great,” said Miku. “You do that.”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/zd3smkddsa9h1i8/Right;_you_do_that.mp3)

They continued in silence for another mile or so before Miku suddenly got an idea. “Gackpo,” she whispered, hoping Kiyoteru wouldn’t hear. “Could you hand me those glasses?”

“Uh, hold on a second.” There was some grunting. “Yeah, I can just about reach them. Here.”

Miku reached her hand back and took them. She nudged Kiyoteru with her foot, and when he turned to look at her, she shoved the glasses on his face.

Kiyoteru gasped loudly. [“What –? Where am I? What happened? Camui-kun? Why is the sun setting already?”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/al0y62n1apvoou9/What_Where_am_I_What_happened_Camui-kun_Why_is_the_sun_setting_already.mp3)

“Let me guess,” said Miku. “You have no recollection of the past half hour.”

“Past half –? My jacket!” Kiyoteru suddenly exclaimed. “Where did it go?!”

“Well, where did you put it?” asked Gackpo.

“I didn’t put it anywhere! It just disappeared!” Kiyoteru shivered. “Now I’m cold!”

“That’d normally be my cue,” Gackpo replied, “but Miku would kill me if I said it, so I won’t.”

Kiyoteru suddenly shrieked. “What’s _that_?!” He pointed in terror at the rearview mirror.

“Hey, now, be polite!” said Gackpo. “He’s only going to be here until the next stop, anyway!”

[“I have no idea what’s going on,”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/ergs7x8j283ydrn/I_have_no_idea_what's_going_on.mp3) Kiyoteru moaned, right before Miku pulled into her own driveway.

Without a word, Davros exited the car and went off into the night.

Just as Miku was about the close the driver’s side door and do the same, Gackpo called one last thing:

[“Hey, Miku! Remember last Christmas, when you and Luka themed the party after Doemu, and everyone cancelled but me, and all three of us ended up in a car with General Grievous?”](http://www.mediafire.com/listen/jo2cjajq4c0qtg6/Hey,_Miku!_Remember_last_Christmas,_when_you_and_Luka_themed_the_party_after_Doemu,_and_everyone_cancelled_but_me,_and_all_three_of_us_ended_up_in_a_car_with_General_Grievous.mp3)

Miku slammed the door with as much force as she could muster.


End file.
